25 Memes That Explain What it’s Like to be an Awkward Introvert Parent

Today is #nationalawkwardmoments day and if there was ever a national -insert random thing here- day that I could relate to on a soul level, this is it. (Other than national carbs and yelling day, but I don’t think that’s a thing yet.) If you’re awkward and you know it,  raise your hand and trip over your feet at the same time! Then read these memes, because you might relate to a few.

 

1. Hello, I’d like to order a lifetime supply of these name tags please; also maybe it could say “please don’t talk to me” at the bottom?

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Via @scarymommy on Instagram

2.   Sometimes you just gotta fire off that text and stress about it for a million hours afterwards, amirite? Whatever keeps us up all night…

 

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Via @lifeattiffanys on Instagram

3. My brain: Correction- everything was going well but now we bout to make shit real awkward. What should we do first to drive people away? Talk about diarrhea and hemorrhoids or sneeze into the punch bowl?
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Via: @mommymemest on Instagram

 

4. I really need more friends but I don’t really want more friends, know what I mean? Listen it’s complicated Karen, let’s just cancel this play date and reschedule never mmkay? Good talk.

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Via @silkymams on Instagram

5.  Don’t make it weird, I’m weird enough.

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Via: @snarkybreeders on Instagram


6.  My Brain: Shut up! Pay attention to the social cues!
My mouth: nah, don’t listen to that, just keep talking until they run away fam!

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Via @macaroniandmomjeans on Instagram

 

7.   I’ve never felt so seen. If you feel this to your core, you might be an awkward introvert and you might be comforted to know that there are more of us out there, (mostly in hiding.)

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Via: @bombingatmomming on Instagram

8.  “It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, Now I’m Filled With Regret”:  the title of my autobiography.

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Via @playdatesonfridays on Instagram

9.  Okay byyyeee, it’s been great not catching up, ignore ya (I mean see ya) at the next forced social gathering.

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Via @draggingfeeties on Instagram

10.  Hmm, I don’t get it. *peers out from my spot behind the tree where I’m hiding from the other parents, only to find my child had joined me*
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Via @mymomologue on Instagram

11.  Introvert vacations: like regular vacations but without the people, overstimulation, noise and bright lights. See also: our beds.

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Via @stamfordmommy on Instagram

12.  I don’t like to brag but I’m committed to my fitness and avoiding people I know at all costs.
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Via @difficultmommy on Instagram

13. It’s really weird, my phone does this thing where it rings while I’m trying to scroll through Instagram and also I don’t understand why you’re not texting me.

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Via @cmonmama on Instagram

14.  And this is why my mom friends are mostly on the internet. *shrugs*

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Via @motherhoodunderstood on Instagram

15.  This is fine. I’m fine.

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Via @closetoclassy on Instagram

16.  I’d love to come to your thing except I’m lying and I’d rather stay home and binge watch shows while eating snacks.

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Via @closetoclassy on Instagram

 

17.   Would you look at the time? It’s awkward o’clock and time to find a new park.

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Via @the.nerd.dad on Instagram

18.  I mean, yeah, I’m the life of the party if the party is filled with people I know and if the party is in my bed and there’s no other people.
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Via @amyweatherly on Instagram

19. Please refer to my nametag in point #1 of this list.

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Via the.nerd.dad on Instagram

20.  Hey, do you guys like Guacamole and thrift stores? Who wants to play charades? No one? Cool, I’ll go first….

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Via @mommymemest on Instagram

21.  Dear cashier at Target, I thought we were friends after you asked me if I wanted a bag and that’s why I’m now telling you my life story.
Signed: a mom who doesn’t get out much

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Via @macaroniandmomjeans on Instagram

 

22.  Can I order this??

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Via @marriageandmartinis on Instagram

23.  My favorite kind of small talk is the kind where no one talks to me.
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Via @healthylivingforhotmesses on Instagram


24.  If this isn’t your manifesto, are you even an awkward mom?

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Via @themomatlaw on Instagram

25.   If I could have any superpower, it would be to make myself disappear when someone suggests this awful activity in a group setting.

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Via @macaroniandmomjeans on Instagram

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I Thought I Was Protecting my Kids on the Internet, Then This Happened

For all intents and purposes I consider myself  a “mommy blogger” because I’m a mom with a blog and I write about parenting challenges.  But unlike some of the traditional curated mommy blogger accounts on social media, I mainly share humor/satire quotes and memes and rarely share pictures or stories about my kids.

They aren’t old enough to consent to me posting about them on a public forum so I have made a personal decision to limit what I post about them.

Even my blog is primarily geared toward satire and I haven’t revealed much in the way of personal information or stories about my children. I feel like that can make it difficult to connect to my audience, but a recent chain of events reminded me why this personal choice might be necessary.

Like most mothers,  I absolutely adore my kids and want to share them with you and the world! I want to show you the hilarious and adorable things they do, talk about the challenges of being a parent and give you personal stories to relate to.

After all, reading personal blogs and following parenting accounts has helped me feel less alone in an isolating period of my life as a stay-at-home mom, and I want my followers to connect with me on that same level.

But as my social media audience grows, I find myself becoming hyper aware of the tens of thousands of random eyes on my page and I’m reminded that having a public profile leaves my page (and my life) open to anyone and everyone.

Everyone including total creepos who follow mom accounts in the hopes of seeing pictures of young children. There’s no nicer way to say it,  and it’s 100000% a thing. I know because it happened in our online parenting community.

My mom instincts told me early on that this follower was potentially sketchy based on the strange comments he left on my pics, the way he stalked my Instagram stories religiously and left weird but harmless DM’s.

In addition, he didn’t fit the age/lifestyle or status quo of my typical followers and a quick look at his profile gave a glimpse into some odd topics and posts.  But he had mentioned a struggle with mental illness in a prior comment so I didn’t want to judge.

I gave him the benefit of the doubt but I also discussed his account with another mommy blogger who had similar interactions with him on Instagram, and we agreed that he had an odd vibe and we couldn’t understand why he followed mommy pages, but overall he seemed harmless.

That was until he left an inappropriate comment about another blogger’s child that sent us all reeling.

We immediately sent out a PSA amongst our group of parenting accounts and he was blocked and reported by many bloggers. We also made a vow to keep an eye out for any other suspicious followers and to keep each other informed.

Even though I wasn’t the one on the receiving end of the inappropriate message, I felt sick and I felt violated. I began to question everything I was doing on the internet and its purpose.

I naively thought that I was protecting my children by keeping their pics off my main page and only posting pictures and videos of them in my Instagram stories, where they receive less views and the stories disappear after 24 hours. But I was wrong, so wrong.

This man was watching my stories regularly, and the haunting thought that he could have photos of my kids (and my friend’s kids) saved to his phone makes me sick to my stomach.

As a parent it is my job to protect my children and look out for their best interest, and I feel like I failed. I know that there are potential predators everywhere- at playgrounds, at schools, in families and in churches, and I know it’s unavoidable to shield them from everyone because predators don’t exactly walk around with a nametag on that says HELLO MY NAME IS… TOTAL CREEPO.

And in the age of social media and the internet, they can be even harder to spot and they have greater access to their subjects of interest.

Even though my posts were harmless family pictures and small glimpses into my life, I still feel a sense of mom guilt and I am questioning how much I should share online.

How do I let my followers know that I’m a human parent just like them, without sharing my kids?

I’m aware that there are hundreds of thousands of children posted all over the internet and that the creeps will unfortunately find other accounts to lurk.

I know that I can’t protect my children from everything or live my life in fear, but as much as I want to share my life with my legitimate like-minded followers, I also have to be cognizant of the fact that there could be many more of these potential predators quietly following along, under fake accounts or internet guises.

What people decide to share on the internet is a personal choice, and while I will continue to share my no-holds barred humor, jokes, blog posts and other media, in light of this recent incident I feel like it’s my duty to make a greater effort to protect my children on my public social media account.

Am I overreacting? Or would you do the same?